The hell?

I suppose it's time for me to scrub myself

By some furniture from these people

Sorry I haven't posted anything in a while folks. It's just been crazy in Florida. Between the new school thing I'm doing and work and lately the nonstop rain we've been getting I haven't had much time to do much of anything. So here I am and all I have for you is the following clip. I have nothing to say about it that'll do it justice... just watch it and I dare you not to get that tune stuck in your head.

Ponderosa...?

Sometimes you see something that catches you completely off guard. Last night that very instance occurred to me. As I drove to the theater to see Star Trek I noticed a Ponderosa out in the wild. I almost ran into a hobo, I was so confused. I haven't seen a Ponderosa since the early 90's. Yet here one stood, in the middle of one of the busiest roads in Central Florida. I wonder what happened to these proud, majestic, restaurants. I went online to do some research and all that I found was somewhat vague. I watched clips of their commercials and the marketing plan seemed solid. Just take a look:

See? Rock solid. Is that waitress wearing a bib? And what is up with the Alien egg on the plate around 14 seconds into the commercial? Oh... and Star Trek was very good...awesome even. Still, it's a sad day to me when a Ponderosa was more... well, life changing then the movie.

Star Trek Day

It's Star Trek day! I'm celebrating... are you? I've got my Gorn costume ready and I've had my fill of Romulan Ale and Tronya. Lets honor this day with a little song:

Brought to you by the letter...

Consider for a moment the letter Z, won't you? Thank you. The last and very lonely in a line of 26 letters in the English alphabet, you rarely ever give it a though I bet. No... but you really should. If it were not for this tiny letter you would not have a beautiful word such as "azure" or be able to warn of a seizure. So let us all contemplate the letter Z the best way that I know how and that is with a video. Do not enjoy this video... relish it.

Coming off of that truly inspired video we should consider the uses for the letter Z. True words such as "zebra" are fantastic but now is really the time for us to be creative. As of late video game designers have creatively slapped the glorious Z to every game that has been created for a preteen girl. I for one see no issues with that. Facebook pets games have become hip now with that swapping of an S with our friend the Z. After all doesn't the letter S already have a whole slew of three and four letter words that it can have fun with? One group who has put the letter Z to great use is Ubisoft. Imagine Babyz! Go ahead and imagine them right now!

With that last video filling our hearts with relief that the letter Z will not die... nay it thrives I sign off. Again, thank you Ubisoft for not forgetting about the little, lonely, Z.

A Mediocre Movie

What are the chances that a summer blockbuster prequel movie based on a previous movie trilogy, based on a cartoon, based on a series of comic books will be decent? Well using the highly anticipated X-Men Origins: Wolverine as a guide might cause one to be alarmed. You see Wolverine isn't a horrible movie but it's far from the multimillion dollar blockbuster we were promised.

If you can't tell the Low Standards offices (Alex and I)took an early day showing of X-Men Origins:Wolverine, the first of two confirmed origins tails... I know... queue sarcastic excitement. The two of us went into this with two varying expectations for this movie. Personally, I was burned by X3, the last excuse of an X-Men movie, and I was not putting a lot into the trailers or the build up. Needless to say my standards for this movie were way down. Alex, on the other hand, was expecting this to be a fantastic movie.

In the end this movie disappointed us both, me less so than Alex who was visibly irritated by the lack of excitement in this movie. Outside of the thin plot (that felt like I was watching Anakin Skywalker turning to the dark side... again), sloppy execution of said plot and the excessive amounts of mutants that served no purpose, this movie just was not fun. Perhaps it was the mutant mania this movie suffered from or the sloppy plot execution... no, no, no... I take back what I was about to say before I say it. This movie just revels in it's messiness and bleak outlook on this character. I don't need a brooding baby that screams when it's made and then cries when it's readily available supply of breasts are taken away. This is what Hollywood does now and it doesn't look like the trend is going away any time soon. One positive though: this movie had some color in it not the soul crushing grey, brown, red, orange, or blue color pallet throughout... yes I'm talking to you 30 days of Night!

To give you a better idea of what we saw today, we at Low Standards, always excited to bring you quality, have procured an exclusive clip of X-Men Origins Wolverine. In this clip Wolverine finds himself in a fight with the deadly Sabretooth. Please enjoy.

Yes, I know, not at all as exciting as we hoped it would be either. This is how the entire movie feels. In short: save your money.